· There is a very fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness.” · · It’s important to take out the fortune before you eat the cookie. · You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

KIDS THESE DAYS I was talking with a friend recently who said, “I can’t stand this younger generation. They are irresponsible, shiftless and can’t show up to work on time.” This person was in their 70s and apparently didn’t remember older people said the same thing about us when we were young.

Take a good look. It’s always there, part of a healthy, whole hand. Hold up your hand and you’ll see it. The one digit that is pointing the opposite of the other four fingers, every time. Oh yeah, you can force it to go along with all the others, but you do have to work at it. Usually, it just naturally sticks out to the side, like “a sore thumb.” It’s always just a little different and obstinately curving away from all the others - but it sure serves a great purpose.

A gripe taken from the lips of one frustrated lady, who was recently overheard in a public place. “I had the family holiday dinner at my house last week, just like I have for years.

A gripe taken from the lips of one frustrated lady, who was recently overheard in a public place. “I had the family holiday dinner at my house last week, just like I have for years.

So now cocaine is legal in Oregon, but straws aren’t. That must be frustrating.