Funny Headlines
Body
*Murderer says detective ruined his reputation *City unsure why the sewer smells *World Bank says poor need more money *Feds say fish need water *Headless body found in topless bar *Statistics show that teen pregnancies drop off significantly after age 25 *Woman missing since she got lost *Woman missing since she got lost *Headline will go here, blah, blah, blah *Scientists kill ducks to see why they are dying *Federal agents raid gun shop, find weapons *Mayor to homeless: Go home *Chine may be using the sea to hide its submarines *Homicide victims rarely talk to police *17 dead in morgue shooting spree *Utah Poison Control reminds everyone to not take poison *Arsenic in the water is nothing to worry about *Army vehicle disappears after being painted with camouflage *One-armed man applauds the kindness of strangers *Mississippi’s literacy program shows improvement *Miracle cure kills fifth patient *A majority of Americans, 4 in 10, say they hate math *Crash occurs when plane hits the ground *Rally against apathy draws a small crowd *Breathing oxygen is linked to staying alive *Underwear bandit caught after brief crime spree *Parents keep kids home to protest school closure *Sewage spill kills fish but water safe to drink *County to pay $250,000 to advertise lack of funds.